Just before lunch [last Thursday], the Leader of the House, Tony Abbott, sought to axe debate on former deputy prime minister John Anderson’s [Australian Wheat Board] share dealings. ‘I move that the snivelling grub over there be not further heard’, he said, referring to … Labor public accountability spokesman Kelvin Thompson. Cue uproar. Pressed to retract the insult …, Abbott ventured an apology worthy of an unrepentant toddler. ‘If I have offended grubs, I withdraw’, he said. (Misha Schubert ‘Can grubs snivel?’, Melbourne Age, 26 May 2006)

Now, how much castigation do you think Abbott will receive from the Religious Right over this tawdry little episode? After all, backbiters won’t be entering the kingdom of heaven. And what was Jesus supposed to have said about loving your neighbour? And turning the other cheek?

But I was forgetting. Tony is anti-abortion, which means that he is a walking saint, which means that he can do no wrong, which means that we can forget all about scathing editorials by Salt Shakers, New Life or anyone else in the club. Now if a nasty, godless Labor, Democrat or Green politician had said what dear Tony said, that would change everything.

Filed in: General